How The Internet Made Me Happy

Sometimes I think I need to stay away from the internet, because it can and will make me batshit crazy. Between trying to self diagnose every little ache and pain, I also tend to run across things that break my heart.

Recently something amazing and unexpected happened, thanks to the internet. Actually thanks to the blogoshpere. To be exact, the Salt Lake blogosphere.

A long, long time ago, I had a really good friend. We were like sisters, and I have always considered her to be one of the best friends I’ve ever had. As were were exiting our teens, and entering out 20’s, I was appalled at some of the choices she was making in her life. The choices I was making, weren’t any better, but it was easier for me to focus on her decisions, and be extremely vocal about it. I hurt her, and I hurt me. Losing this friendship was worse than breaking up with a boyfriend.

I heard little bits and pieces about her over the years, but that stopped a long time ago. I still thought about her, and always wondered where she was and if she was okay. When I was in Utah, a few months ago, my mom mentioned her. After this, she was on my mind more than ever.

A little over a month ago, I was reading a friend’s blog, from there I clicked on one of her links, which led me to a name that jumped out at me. I clicked here, and I clicked there. Holy fucking shit, my long lost friend, was in front of my face. She was okay, not only was she okay, but she is a mom, and a wife, and is still so beautiful. My heart soared, but I didn’t know what to do. I was afraid that if I contacted her, she might reject me. I’m so fucking sensitive lately, that I don’t think my little heart could take it.

I talked to a couple of friends about this, and they advised me to go for it. I sat on it for a few weeks, then about two weeks ago, I knew I had to do it. I wrote an email, and sent it. After 12 hours with no answer, I was totally dejected. I went to a work meeting, came back, and discovered that she had responded back. I opened up up, read it, and sat and my desk and sobbed. She didn’t reject me, and was thrilled to hear from me.

Over the last few weeks, we’ve been catching up. As adults, it’s so strange that we have so much in common. Though our lives are totally different, we seemed to have taken many of the same paths. Having her back in my life, has been such a joy. Over the weekend, I heard her voice for the first time in 19 years, and she sounded just the same.

I asked her permission before writing this, and she said she would be honored.

Princess C, mi amiga, I’m so happy to have you back!